SYTYCD Recap: Early Standouts?

So as I did with Idol, I probably won't be giving full recaps of SYTYCD until the finalists are chosen (this time, it will be the Top 20 as opposed to the Top 13). But after watching last night, there are a few things I wanted to comment on:

What I have learned from SYTYCD so far:

- There is a girl, Janette Manara who is trying to be Cheryl Burke.. Janette did improve her salsa moves, but this still may not be enough. This is the girl who used to have a skunk streak in her hair during previous season's auditions, but now I suppose she stands a better chance this year if she sports a Burke-do while also doing the same facial expressions as the Dancing With The Stars champ. This kind of bugs me because what I want to see is something different! We don't need no stinkin' imitations.

- Something different, however, did come in the form of Evan Kasprzak and his older brother, Ryan. I was so excited to see Evan's return (he made it to the top 40 last year, and then, at the last moment, the judges inexplicably cut him. Now if I remembered him from last year, well, let's just say the guy's got something.) His brother Ryan was equally interesting, using a whoopee cushion as a relevant and hilarious prop during his amazing tap routine. These guys bring something new to the table. They bring in the old Gene Kelly, classic stylings; and oh yeah, Evan probably has one of the most powerful toe touches I have ever seen. (Unsurprisingly, they both made it straight through to Vegas, but my gut says Evan will make it further than big bro (sweat-stained) Ryan.)

- And on the same note of siblings, two little blonde Kinney sisters both displayed some amazing talent last night. I would say that one (if not both) of these beauties will make it into the top 20. (But if we had to only pick one, I'm going to go with the one who had hip surgery ... anyone?)

- Lastly, I learned that there is a girl who is the second coming of Gokey. Well, at least she has the same widower back-drop story. The difference, however, between Talia Rickards from Gokey is that well, first of all, she crumps, but more importantly, I just don't think she's got what it takes to crack past the top 40.

And those are my early thoughts for now. Who caught your eye as one to watch? Silky? And what was up with Tyce Diorio? Did he have some unwarranted bitchiness going on perhaps for the sake of good TV? I thought it was just kind of weird.

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So You Think You Can Dance: Will It Move Me? I Shall Find Out Tonight!

Yes, my fellow Idol lovers who have been wondering, I WILL be tuning in tonight to that other Fox program: So You Think You Can Dance (herein forth to be referred to as "SYTYCD"; dang -- "Idol" was so much simpler). Again, I apologize for missing the first episode; Florida was calling my name. You understand.

Now I have to put up this disclaimer: I will be tuning in tonight a bit unsure of how I feel about this show. Will I be sassy? Will I be sweet? I just don't quite yet know what my, if you will, visceral response to this Idol-Runner-Up programming will be.

Clearly, (in large part due to the awesomeness that was American Idol: Season 8) Idol has quickly become my favorite show on television ... hands down. As Idol viewers, we get to follow a seemingly unknown along his or her path to super stardom -- an emotional journey with tear-filled highs and gut-wrenching lows, but we love it, and we even feel like we have a great hand in propelling our chosen one into said super stardom through the simple power of our texts. (And I ain't talking about power texts.)

We have the Idol moments along the way, where all of a sudden the underdog switches it up and turns a current chart-topping rap song into a tender melody, slapping us in the face and forcing us to listen to it in a way we had never heard of before. And as much as I declared at shows end (to myself, to friends, and to the land of Facebook) that "I will never watch this stupid show again!", I find myself longing for next season when I can go through this tumultuous journey all over again.

Wait. This was going to be a simple start-up post about SYTYCD. But I suppose I found myself getting back on the Idol-track because there are many parallels of SYTYCD to Idol. I mean, if singers can do it, dancers can do it too, right? Evoking the passion we never knew was in us, that is. The passion that causes me to (for the first time) engage in a game of fist-a-cuffs with my DVR after missing an Adam Lambert performance. And considering this season of Idol ended up becoming the main topic of my blog, I would say that SYTYCD has some mighty big shoes to fill.

I am feeling somewhat profound right now, so I think I will incorporate an inspirational quote into my SYTYCD posts. Dancing is after all, inspired and inspirational.

"There are short-cuts to happiness, and dancing is one of them."

(If you are thinking, "where did sassy-frass Elizabeth go?" I say, "Don't worry . . . I'm sure I will find plenty of moments for the sass you know and love; but with a different show, comes different vibes," I say.)

So will SYTYCD fire you up? Does it move you? Since I missed the first night, any comments on who jumped out at you? Any moments that got under your skin? I did hear news of controversy surrounding a same-sex couple dancing together. Or, are you just still sad over Idol? If so, what new justifications have you come up with?

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Uh Oh! Did Kris Get By With a Little Help From AT&T Friends?

According to The New York Times, the voting that powered our newest American Idol, Kris Allen, to the top may have been woefully askew. Apparently, two Allen parties held on the night of the finals had a few AT&T employees in attendance. In case you forgot, AT&T is one of AI's biggest sponsors. Instead of BYOB, it was Bring Your Own Demo Phones that allow a voter to text exponentially! This "power texting" allowed for 10 votes being cast with just the touch of a button! It seems that the same was not done for Adam Lambert.

Fox has yet to comment, but I found this little statement by AT&T to be quite interesting: "In Arkansas, we were invited to attend the local watch parties organized by the community. A few local employees brought a small number of demo phones with them and provided texting tutorials to those who were interested."

Hmmm . . . something stinks in Arkansas.

What do you all think of this Idol scandal? Now that I'm finally getting content (and even slightly happy with Adam's second place finish), they spring this on me. Ay-yi-yi! Will it ever end? And will we be seeing Kris' "O" face for the fourteenth-millionth time when he is dethroned? Nah, that will never happen. But it should be quite interesting to see what transpires next.

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I am Back!

Well I am back from Florida, my friends. Idol is over. Kris is the winner. And Adam is still a star. Elizabeth is still a little bitter. But she has also grown -- into a state of acceptance, that is.

Now, a motto I believe in is "if it's meant to be, then it will be." So I will have faith in that.

Once I get over my jet lag and caught up on the new programs I have missed (So You Think You Can Dance), I will get back to the regular posting . . .

Thanks for your patience :-)

Elizabeth

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American Idol: I AM AT A LOSS

Elizabeth is speechless. The blog site that is myrealitybit.com may be no more. (Half joke ... so don't stop following me.)

A large piece of it has died due to reasons I can not even write about right now because if I do, this cruel shock of a joke may become real.

I will say one thing. At least Adam is not bound by the crap that is "No Boundaries," and he can release a single that people will actually want to hear.

I mean, I got love for Kris Allen. (So cute when he said that Adam deserved it.) But REALLY?!?!?!?!?

Current Emotional Stage Elizabeth Is In: DENIAL

(She will let you know when she is out of hiding.) Right now, she just wants to crawl under her blankie, lie her little head on her Adam Lambert pillow, and pray. Pray that when she wakes up, this will have been all one big nightmare.

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American Idol: Who Will It Be??!?!?

We are just a half hour away from the live 2-hour finale -- on the verge of finding out who our next American Idol is! First of all, let me start out by saying that I apologize for the lack of recap of last night's performance. I will have you know that Elizabeth is taking a much needed va-cay to Florida! She has been traveling all day and is wearied. (Not to mention the fact that I did not get much sleep as I was tossing and turning from nightmares directly spawning from last night's abomination, a.k.a. the Kara DioGuardi coronation song! The horror if that has to be the first single of Adam or Kris!)

In fact, I am flying over Atlanta right now! Now had I known when I booked my reservation 3 months ago that my travels would interfere with my Idol, I would have told my friend who is getting married -- "Sorry. But, you understand."

Anyways, with the great invention of Wi-Fi on most participating Delta flights (I should be their spokesperson), I will be able to see every second of the finale! (Well, almost every second!)

26 minutes and counting . . . who will it be?!?!??

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American Idol: Ding! Ding! Ding! It's Almost Showtime!

In one corner: It's the lovable puppy dog, Kris Allen. The man nobody thought stood a chance until he came out swinging with stripped down renditions of "Ain't No Sunshine When She's Gone," "She Works Hard for the Money," and, of course, the one we will never forget -- "Heartless." But does this dog have another "Heartless" trick up his sleeve? Kris fans need it as he faces off against who is

In the other corner, Idol favorite, Adam Lambert! The guy who is widely speculated as someone who could be the first gay American Idol, and, therefore, a contestant who could make Idol history! -- something I personally don't give a hoot about. I say he makes more history through his note-breaking vocal ability, the variations of his look, his song choices -- a guy who has all the sex appeal in the world, but yet also seems like one who wouldn't hurt a fly. And somehow, all of this craziness works!

These two deserving finalists have proven in past performance nights that they have the drive and determination to win. And I'm sure TONIGHT will be NO exception.

So just who will turn in the most memorable performance of the night? The gloves are off! Now it's just a matter of time before that bell rings! Ooooohhhh!!! Can't WAIT!!!!

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The Bachelorette Airs Tonight!

Tonight is the premier of The Bachelorette! (Yay! Something to watch now that Idol is ending.) First-runner-up, Melissa Rycroft, is excelling on Dancing With the Stars! Now let's see how Jillian fairs, after also being dumped by that creepo Jason Meznick. I wonder how him and Molly are doing . . . ah, who am I kidding? Does anybody actually care about those two?!

Jillian is the typical girl-next-door, who has an atypical asphyxiation with hot dog toppings. Now if I can just get over that accent, I think I'll be okay.

[Update: After just watching the introduction of her "gentleman callers," I'm going to go out on a limb and make my early picks: Mark the "pizza guy" and Jake "the pilot" who so cheesily donned his captain's hat and did the ol' once over in the mirror. Do guys really do that?] 

What about you? Will you be watching? Any early picks?

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FUN IDOL GOSSIP

Almost 2 1/2 days until Adam Lambert is crowned the next American Idol! I mean, 'til we find out who our next Idol will be! So, in the meantime, I present a couple of fun Idol facts:

Mark Kaye of WAPE 95.1 interviewed Paula Abdul this past Saturday, in which she revealed she is not sure whether her or Kara DioGuardi will return next year (contradicting Simon's recent statements on Ellen.) Simon, however? Well, he's apparently signed on for another year.

Good thing because results from an AOL Television poll reveal that 70% of American Idol fans think the show is as exciting as ever, but 49% will not watch if Simon Cowell left. [44% think that Kara DioGuardi is “awful.” This is also abundantly clear in my own little poll to the right. Paula is almost a 3 to 1 favorite!] Ha! DioGuardi certainly seems to be expendable, but I ask, "An Idol without the Paula?!" Why, that's like a Big Mac without the special sauce! (Indeed, Paula is "special." But please, Paula! Don't run off and join Dancing with the Stars!)

Now this one's interesting: According to a recent post on rickey.org, sources say that Anoopie and Megan Joy are dating! Now THAT is quite the couple! I guess Megan was feeling Anoopie's sexy stubble-faced makeover just like me. Just don't become too entranced by her fem-bot ways Anoop!

Yay! Today is Monday! Which means, Tuesday is almost upon us!!!!

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American Idol Results Recap: Just How Did We Get to a Kris/Adam Finale?

Okay, everybody. I'm sure you are expecting a post full of Gokey bashing, sprinkled with some Adam/Kris gloating, but I have decided that I am going to try and be unbiased, look at how we got to this final two, and write from an objective point of view. (We will see how long this lasts, but cut me some slack ... I'm trying.)

I'm also feeling friendly because I realized something last night -- regardless of what side you air on ... you gotta love the passion that has been unique to this whole American Idol Season 8! I have never seen anything like it before! So let's embrace it because it is all so very, very exciting. (Aw, lookie there. An Adam hater wiping the blood off Glambert #3081, and embracing that Glambert, just like Kris' dad did to him. Perhaps when hell freezes over, but I'm trying to be Peacemaker Elizabeth here.) Channeling my Eccentric Panther, I say, "Spread the Love. Spread the Love." (YouTube it in case you missed that most excellent audition of Idol's seasons past.)

Now my objectivity will be broken down simply into who owned each Tuesday night, when looking back at the past nine performance episodes (a.k.a., the beginning of the Top 13).

Michael Jackson Songs: Tie between Gokey ("PYT") and Adam ("Black or White")

Country Week: Matt G. ("So Small")

Motown: Adam ("Tracks of My Tears")

I-Tunes: Kris ("Ain't No Sunshine" -- This was truly the point when Kris proved himself as a force to be reckoned with)

Year you were Born: Adam ("Mad World")

Songs from the Cinema: Kris ("Falling Slowly")

Disco Night: Kris ("Hard for the Money") (with an Adam close second "If I Can't Have You")

Rat Pack: Gokey ("Come Rain or Come Shine")

Rock Night: Adam ("Whole Lotta Love") (and of course, the "Slow Ride" duet!)

[And, of course, to throw in this very last performance round ... well, we all know the one word that summed up that night: "Heartless."]

Which brings the score to .... Gokey: 2, Kris: 4, Adam: 4, and Matt G.: 1.

And that's about as objective as it's going to get, folks! So in looking at the numbers, I would say we have the exact two that should be there in the finale. (And to toot my own horn, this is the two I predicted three weeks ago, which you can see under the "Comments" section of my Disco Post.)

And since I'm in a quizzy mood, I ask you,

Which part of the night was your highlight?

1) The lone girl in red plaid pajama pants, silver sequenced top and pink boa chasing Danny down with her neon green sign, screaming "DANNY!";

2) Kris' dad -- at every point in the episode. (I mean, I actually teared up! And then they had to play "Falling Slowly" in the background!? And Kris, with the icing on the cake, saying "Don't cry momma." Really people!? You're turning me into a big ball of Abdul mush!); or

3) The scantily clad "bra girl" who charged Adam, and Adam handling it like a pro. -- The situation, that is. As in, he charmingly laughed it off.

[I will omit obvious choices of Kris and Adam being announced as safe. Because for you-for me, when Adam was announced, I literally threw my remote across the room and my arms immediately flew up into the air, somewhat involuntarily -- much like the hand and leg movements of that little Rwandan kid -- and I let out a yelping "Hallelujah!" But that's just me.]

Now as for the really burning questions (and there's a lot of them, so resharpen your #2 pencils!):

Who was more of a look-a-like last night: Bill Hader (the Museum movie promo guy in the beginning) looking like Zac Effron; or that guy sitting next to Kevin Bacon looking like the twin of Randy Jackson? Which was more disturbing for you to see: Allison Iraheta in the audience or a Gokey homecoming fan holding the sign "Scream On"?

Also, now that Gokey is gone, do you think his votes will transfer over into Kris votes? Apparently there were only 1 million votes separating number 1 and number 2 last night, so do you think this little dark horse actually stands a chance against Secretariat Lambert? Which was more robotic of the night: Danny Gokey's hand gestures or Katie Perry's eyes? (Her saucers were bringing me back to the haunting days of when Megan Joy decided to belong to the world of the Fem-Bots.)

And last but not least, just where in the hell can I go find me one of those "Adam Lambert" capes? I must get me one so that I can tie it around my neck and run up and down my street as fast as I can once Adam Lambert is announced as "The Next American Idol"!!! (Oops ... I forgot. I was being objective.) Do post your thoughts below!

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A Kris and Adam Finale!!! America has Put The Go in Gokey!!!

CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES, COME ON!!!!!
THE PIPE DREAM HAS BECOME A REALITY!!!!!!!!!

Full post to follow. Right night, I'm celebrating!

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Idol Trifecta: Dark Horse Stays in the Running while the Favorite Flies!

My my my. Quite the performance show tonight. Where to begin?!!? Well, I will just start out by saying, if the final two (after tonight especially) does not include Kris and Adam, I will dig a little hole through my basement floor, squeeze into it, crawl into said hole, sit Indian style, cross my little arms, and refuse to ever be seen again. Okay, okay. Maybe that is an exaggeration. I will crawl into said hole, sit Indian style, cross my little arms, and only come out every once in a while for some mac & cheese. (A girl needs to eat after all.) But then, it's right back in the hole!

I mean, come on people. After tonight, if it is not clear that this is who the final two should be, then please, make your own little hole, find yourself a little blankie, get comfortable and a good meal in your belly, because soon ... it's "NO mac & cheese for you!"

Sorry. I tend to go off on those little tangents. So let's just get Gokey out the way, shall we? Paula chose his song, "Dance Little Sister." Yeah, I never heard of it either. Neither did Danny. So my cold little heart warmed up to him for a fleeting moment. I say fleeting because as soon as the song was over, and the judges gave their critiques, Danny found a way to butt his specs-wearing head in. Kara asked, "Was it memorable?" (To which the answer was, "No.") Thank you, Kara, for a sound critique. Simon called Danny's dancing "desperate." Okay, okay. Feeling that. And then I hear "For me ..." But hold up. That's not the sound of Randy's voice! Why, it's none other than Mr. Gokey himself! Yes, Danny decides to cut in and say, "For me. It's about having fun." Yeah, yeah, Danny. We got that indication last week when you thought your cat-mating yell was soooooo hilarious!

Then, we have some more judges banter, and, I admit, the Simon/Paula schtick grew a little tired. But did Gokey really have to school everyone and say "You know what? When you feel the pressure, you just got to shake it off and go all the way forward." And THEN, he backs it up with a good ol' "but i appreciate what you guys have to say...." Well, Danny, I'm glad they could be there for you in case you want to listen in between your bouts of hilariousness. (Now I have to take a brief moment to ask, "Would Adam ever say something like this?" I think not.)

Moving on. (Danny fans, if you're still with me ... stick around. I'm trying to sway you. But if I've already lost you, ah well.)

Kris Fights the Dark Horse Stigma: Now true. It was rather funny that Kara and Randy had to decide on a song together. Kind of puts them in their place, huh? But I liked the song they chose -- "Apologize" by One Republic. What I did not like were the judges' words that followed. I mean, how many times did they have to use the words "Dark Horse"?! While Randy says it was "very nice, baby," Kara calls is "competent." COMPETENT!? Paula says he hit a "bum note" but that she was "proud." Now true, maybe I am two glasses deep into my $3.00 wine, but really? Is this really happening?!? FINALLY, Simon asks, "How can you say there was a bum note and then say I'm so proud?" Thank you, Simon. Here I was beginning to think bum notes are okay so long as you back it up with "You get an 'A' for effort." Because that was okay with Gokey's "bum" note last week, right? AND, once again, I digress.

My Spoiler was Right: True indeed, Simon chose Adam's song, and the song was "One" by U2. Despite Randy's attempt of sabotage by criticizing that it was "off the melody" (because that would be a bad thing), the rest of the judges see the light, and Paula even calls Adam "the American Idol" right then and there. Nuff' said.

Well it's half-time, and we visit "Idol Gives Back," an under-made-up Carrie Underwood and the African kids. Aw lookie there. They got some nets. That's nice.

2nd Half: The boys take their Picks.

Gokey is Unoriginal and Kris Proves this Dark Horse Just Passed Your Ass Like Mine That Bird: Okay. So this is the stretch where things got real exciting. (And I don't think it's because by now, I'm three glasses deep. Hell, I'm beginning to have more glasses than Gokey!) Okay, okay. Gokey sings "You are so Beautiful." Sure, it was pretty. Yeah, it was good. But it was also the reincarnation of T. Hicks! I mean, it was at this exact same moment for this forgetful former Idol winner that he sang this exact same song! But I guess this doesn't really matter since Danny is just having fun and is "not going to worry about all the O-pinions." Okay, Danny. Don't worry about those judges who won't point out your copy-cat song choice. But don't step to the Elizabeth, Gokey. I know all B-yatch!

Now moving on to a completely ORIGINAL song choice -- Kris sings "Heartless" by Kanye West! As soon as this was announced, my friend, Jaclyn, texts me "this could be a disaster." And I'll admit, I was truly shaking in my slippers as I poured me some more vino. But as soon as it started, all unplugged and on his gee-tar . . . well I found myself totally DIGGING it! No guts, no glory, I say! Three cheers for originality! This Bud's for You Kris! Oops, sorry. It was at this point, I was thinking I was in a bar, actually cheers-ing Kris with my wine glass. But in all seriousness, this rendition Kris did, now THIS is what I want to hear on the radio. THIS is exactly what Kris needed to do. Simon says he had written Kris out after "Apologize," but "that, however, has all changed." Indeed. We have a race on our hands now, folks!

Watching the Clock. Watching the Clock. Adam is last. He's going to sing Aerosmith's "Cryin," and I'm worried I am about to have another "Mad World" crime scene in my living room. But never the mind. I'm over it because Adam, of course, kills it. Knockin' out his earpiece because, hey, who needs THAT?, and Simon sums it up with the perfect end ... "It's very easy to assume you're going to sail through to the final next week. So let me just take it back to tonight. The show is about finding a star. Who has earned the right to be in the final. And I want everyone not to assume that you're going to be there. But to vote for you, because you deserve it based on talent." Thank you. (This, of course, was followed by Adam's ever-present sportsmanship, humbleness and modesty.)

So what did you all think of tonight's most awesome show?! Would it be simply "outrageous" if Adam is not in the finals? And after Kris' performance, would it be "heartless" if he is not the one competing alongside Mr. Lambert? Also, just what was up with Kris' one little chipped blue fingernail when he received his Paula text? Was this as strange as Kara's most bodacious shoulder pads? Did you have a hard time getting through to vote at first like I did? Seacrest said the boys won't get any sleep tonight ... but this girl will. Thanks to the wine and the sweet dreams I will be having all due to my champions, Kris and Adam. You go, boys. You go.

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American Idol ... It's Almost Showtime!!!

                                          (come on, Kris. Fight the powers that be!)

Can you feel it? It's that Idol excitement looming in the air. Because in almost one and a half hours, we will be free of the "Disco" and "Mo-Town" theme nights and all the song choice restrictions they bring, and we will find out just what our beloved Idols (I'm talking to you Adam and Kris!) choose to sing (and perform if you're initials are A.L.) when the song choice is open to any song their little hearts desire. Now since the song book is soooooo wide open here, I'm just going to leave it in their trusty hands.

And, of course, those of the judges since there is also that Judges' Choice tonight. But I have always been a fan of this, especially when it comes to Simon's picks. (Does anyone recall his choice for Katherine McPhee? Somewhere Over the Rainbow? Nuff' said.) (WILL Adam sing ONE? WILL Adam sing Wicked Game?) My excitement is mounting ...

Now I still have my pipe dream of an Adam/Kris finale, but I'm slowly accepting the fact that this most likely won't happen. The Gokey-noids are so far gone, they are all being robotically led in droves, hypnotized by cat-mating screams, only able to repeat "must vote Gokey" "must vote Gokey."

Not only are these fans hypnotized, but, tonight, we will see just how mind-warped our panel of "esteemed" judges have become. Will they be handing out those "A's" for effort regardless of heinous vocals? Will they continue to throw Kris under the bus regardless of stellar vocals? Ugh! I don't even want to think about the possibility. I'm unnerved and excited at the same time!

I just bought me a bottle of fine $3.00 wine, and only time will tell how much of it I need to drink! Bring it on Gokey! Bring it on Kara! I'll be watching and sniffing out the slightest hints of sabotage, taking my ever faithful notes, all the while cursing, smiling, drinking, cursing, laughing, loving Adam, drinking, cursing, blaspheming DioGuardi, drinking ... God I love this show!

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The Hills: Audrina Is Sooooo Over It!

On last night's Hills, we saw Stephanie messing up (again) at People's "Rev," Lo, I'm sorry, Lo-ie starting a job (for quite possibly the first time in her life) at Smashbox, and Heidi glamming it up to go meet Stacie at The Dime (where nothing was resolved, but does it really matter since we all know Speidi is married?). What IS worth a comment or two is in regard to this little question -- When in The Hell did the Dreen-ster grow a BACKBONE!? And a strong one at that!?

Apparently, through a Lauren lunch hint, we learn that Audrina blew off JB a few times (why did I have to glance that sentence over to make sure it was appropriate?). Then we learn, via subtitles, that Audrina dismisses JB while at a Script concert, I mean, work. All leading up to quite the climax (I'm really not trying to be dirty, guys, I swear). Here is the play-by-play:

Dreen-ster walks into Boho wearing a casual gray tee, blue jeans, and holy moly! What are those things on her feet?! Looks like someone got a hold of her simple black heels and bedazzled the hell out of them! Anyhoo, turns out this bar is apparently where Justin Bobby has been holed up, seeking refuge ... for lord knows how long. Either that, or he just escaped the mental ward because, at first glance, you would have thought he was a crazy in a black straight jacket.

He tells the Dreen-ster she looks "cute", and she proceeds to go "straight into it -- just like that."

Dreenie: "I can't do it anymore ... We both need to go our separate ways ... We can't even be friends. We've tried that. It doesn't work."

JB: "Don't get into it with me right now."

Dreenie: "I'm telling you this. That's it. I came to say goodbye face to face. And that's it. Don't call me. Don't text me. It's over." (She runs out the door.)

JB: "Whatever." (He sees if he can beat her in being first out the door.)

Dreenie: "That's it."

(It proceeds with snapping (figuratively and literally), Brody accusations, "we were never committed" talk, and ends with Dreenie seeming genuinely pissed, telling JB he's a liar and walking the ef outta there!)

Who knew she had it in her? I will even overlook the re-appearance of Jack-O hat because I do believe she even got in a subtle dig at Lo-ie! ["You know what's so funny? I used to work for Quixote Smashbox like THREE years ago."] Aw ... momma's proud. Stay strong girl! Now go get that Brody!

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American Idol: Possible Spoiler for Tonight...

So tonight on Idol, we will see Kris, Danny and Adam take the standard finalist journeys back to their individual hometowns. Where they will be King [I don't want any queen jokes here people] of the parade! Where cheerleaders will rally! And, of course, where they will find out what judge's song choice they get! (Hmmm ... will they knock Kara out of the picks here?)


Regardless, we have seen that Mr. Adam Lambert has always been FULL of surprises when it comes to song choice, and if you want to continue to be surprised, I suggest you do not read any further after this Adam picture ...



Okay, you naughty devil, you, here is your Spoiler. Follow the Adam jumps by clicking on the orange links.
Word on the Idol Street is that this judge chooses Adam's song (Hooray! It's not this one!), and it is is rumored to be either this beautiful song or possibly even this one. Oooooohhhhh baby! Can't Wait!

[image via www.ew.com]

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Look-A-Like for The Week

Left: "12-Pack" from the gem that is Daisy of Love

Right: "Ice-Man" (Val Kilmer) in Top Gun

(By the way, I don't remember Daisy being so unfortunate looking in the face from when she was on that other pearl, Rock of Love ... anyone?)

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Sound Bite of the Week: TIME MAGAZINE Calls Adam Lambert a Star

"Idol is a reliable source of platinum talent largely because the talents it produces--Kelly Clarkson, Chris Daughtry, Carrie Underwood--respect the conventions of its genres. They are nice singers who sing nice songs nicely. Lambert, 27, may have the best chops of the bunch (his ability to hold high notes recalls Grace Slick in her prime), but where he really outshines them is in self-awareness. While his peers act as if being plucked from obscurity to sing in prime time is normal, he understands that he's on a television show, where acting normally would be completely abnormal. In his hands, a song and a performance are separate messaging opportunities, so "Born to Be Wild" becomes a rock anthem and show tune, "Ring of Fire" a love song verging on the orgiastic.

The judges love Lambert, but they are also routinely stumped: "Confusing and shocking and sleazy!" shouted Kara DioGuardi after Lambert seduced Sammy Davis Jr.'s "Feeling Good." Lambert might just be too weird for a show this big. But win or lose, it won't matter: after producing plenty of singers, American Idol has found its first star."

-TIME MAGAZINE (click on this post's title if you want the entire article)

Indeed, Adam is so much more than just a singer. I mean, really. The rest might as well just be competing for second. Adam, I'm so glad you chose to finally become a household name via my little show, American Idol. It is so very exciting to witness the birth of a STAR! And that is exactly what you are. Keep shining baby!

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I'm Just a Girl on American Idol, And It's a Bitch.

Well, the tissues are used up. As well as the toilet paper. And even, yes, the paper towels. Damn my nose is sore. But you know what's even more sore? My little heart. Because last night, our Allison Iraheta was taken from us, leaving me to absently wave at my TV, thinking Allison could actually see me, and leaving us to face the unfair truth that Gokey is, in fact, a top three finalist. Yes, my friends, I am all cried out.

Now I have been seeking out my words of wisdom to share with you all so that we may come together, embrace what has happened, and move forward.

Allison was "Just a Girl" in this big Idol world, and, indeed, it was hard for her to fight the man. The man being the show that is American Idol. The man being the a-hole that is Simon "no my face is not stuck like this - I just always look pissed off because I'm a piece of poop" Cowell. (I would love to have called him something more than a piece of poop, but I will keep it PG. Well, maybe I can call him whatever Allison did last night. I mean, did she really get BLEEPED?! You go girl!)

That small victorious moment aside, I cried. I wept. I even let out yells and howls that resembled very much something like Gokey's cat-mating scream from Tuesday night. Ooohh. Musn't relive that. Musn't relive the scream that once was referred to as something out of a horror movie, to now something that has become the most comical moment of Danny Gokey's life! Well gee whizz, Danny. I'm glad you could take so much comfort in how freakin' HILARIOUS your scream was. Good for you! Really. But, I'm sorry. Isn't this a SINGING competition and not Last Freaking Comic Standing?!

I digress.

Allison will move on now to bigger and better things. Let us just take solace in another fourth place finisher, Chris Daughtry. Very poetic that he performed on last night's show. And let us not forget, Allison absolutely KILLED her second-go-round of "Cry Baby." Not that Tuesday's wasn't magnificent, but last night's was simply awesome. That's right! Rub it in their faces! Forget those judges who didn't see your personality. Forget that they didn't give you parting words of wisdom. You just listen to big brother, Adam. And that other Rock God, Slash --"You're only 17? That kicks ass over most 30 year-olds I know." Well said, Slash. Well said. And, Allison, your thumbs up with that big cheese-er-ific grin during your exit package was so chock-full of bright, shining personality traits -- well let's just say, I had to borrow Slash's sunglasses (allowing me to witness what lurked beneath. It wasn't pretty). Way to go out with style girl! I look forward to seeing you around soon.

So what did you all think of the horrifying results show? Are you comforted? Or are you still angry? And did it just make you want to cry even more during Allison's performance to see her mom with no rhythm? Oh bless her. It was almost as cute as Elliot's mom. (More tears filling my eyes.) In the words of push-up queen, Gwen, have you "had it up to here" with undeserving contestants being pushed and pimped because they were hand-picked (by lip-syching judges) early on as the "chosen ones"? Did you find it strange that Kris Allen presented Chris Daughtry with the platinum record because, as Ryan pointed out, both of their names are Kris/Chris. Um, okay. Finally, just how cute was it when Adam said he loved his outfit?! I melted. And one more final note, will you miss Allison as much as me? Take care everyone. We will get through this.

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My Letter to Kris Allen

Dear Kris:
 

I just wanted to write this letter because after tonight, I may never see you again. If America got it right last night, I will. But I'm not banking on it.

You did not deserve to be thrown under the bus by those Idol judges last night. Keep in mind that they were just supporting the pre-ordained Gokey. (I will not even get into THAT rant again, because this letter is about you.)

You've come a long way kid. And I ain't talkin' about just those looks of yours. Who knew from that day long ago, when you came into my life, singing "Man In The Mirror," you'd be here now -- in the Top 4? You were certainly the underdog, and I am proud to say you really have come into your own.

I will be watching you tonight with bated breath. And please know, if it's you who goes home, instead of that Danny, there will be a silent tear, falling down a little cheek, in a little apartment, somewhere in the South. You didn't deserve such abuse last night. And anytime you need a break from little wifey, I will be your shoulder to cry on. Yes, in fact, just come home. Momma's waiting.

With love, understanding, and a warm pillow to rest your wearied little head,

Elizabeth

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Idol Rock Night: A Hodge Podge of Duets, Cuteness and the Scream Heard 'Round the World!

Well I never thought I would use the word "cute" to describe Idol's Rock Night, but Rock Night turned out to be just that -- too stinkin' cute! With the exception of my ears bleeding from Gokey's solo, the night overall was a delightful hand-wrapped pink package of cuteness. Okay, maybe not pink . . . but a hand-wrapped black package did not sound right.

As expected, rockers Allison and Adam were no disappointment. And as far as the whole pimp slot thing goes, well, I guess Adam eventually had to serve his time in slot number one, but we will prove that it doesn't matter because Adam HAS to be safe. He just has to. And if he's not . . . I will start a riot. Man. Listen to me. I'm saying things like "WE will prove" and "I will start a riot?!" I'm all of a sudden picturing myself leading that riot, wearing nothing but some heavy eyeliner and a sign, draped from my neck, that reads "Glamberts Unite!" -- perhaps just marching up and down my street because the FOX studios are too far away, but I will be marching no less.

Adam KILLED Led Zeppelin's "Whole Lotta Love." And to those Adam-haters who want to argue, "well this was HIS genre," I reply, "why then has he killed every other genre?" Let's just face it, Gokey lovers . . . Gokey was bad. He was REAL bad.

In fact, I am still hiding under my blankie, sucking my thumb, afraid to come out because I fear Gokey is standing over me . . . watching. Waiting. Luckily, I pulled my computer under the covers and am able to finish this post. And then . . . it's Godspeed, Elizabeth.

Yes, Gokey lovers. I'm sorry. But that rendition of Aerosmith's "Dream On," well . . . I have no words. (Shocking, I know.) Slash was right when he set it up, pointing out that "everybody is going to be waiting for [that scream] at the end. If you pick that song, you better be able to do it." Yeah, I'll admit -- I was nervous. Paula's dancing, building it up even more, didn't help either. All the buildup while, I'm thinking, "why has he chosen this song?! It's not going to work!" Sure enough. As soon as it was "dream on! dream on!," I found myself drifting off into a nightmare. But -- I would rather not relive it. After all, my poor ears were bursting with mini blood rockets. Now, now. I know that's gross guys. But Simon did compare the performance to a horror film, and that is exactly what was going on in my living room. (Even still, considering I'm about to have a reenactment of Psycho on my hands because I still believe Gokey to be by my bedside.)

Now I have predicted a Gokey fourth place finish, and if there's any justice in this crazy world (after tonight's performance especially), that is exactly what will happen. But I am getting the feeling that this season's fans are so passionate about their chosen contestant, it may not be about the quality of individual performances anymore. . . rather, it may have become more of a war -- drawing the battle lines between "Team Adam" and "Team Gokey." (Guess which t-shirt I sport?)

Wow. I got off on such a tangent there, I forgot to talk about the whole "cuteness" factor. And this comes in to play particularly with that other contestant who performed -- the lovable Kris Allen. Remember him? I just wanted to embrace Kris tonight and tell him, "there there, Kris. Don't you worry about those evil judges. You just come with me and forget about little blonde wifey." (I keed. I keed.) But poor Kris really took a beating, didn't he?

After the extremely cute "Renegade" duet he did with Danny (I don't know why guys, it was just cute!), Simon simply critiques, "Danny was better." And with just those three little words, all of the life in Kris Allen got sucked right out. Sure, he tried to buck up afterwards, performing "Come Together" by the Beatles (it fits because it's "classic rock" people), but after Simon then compares Kris' performance to "eating ice for lunch [because] it leaves you with nothing to remember afterwards," Kris just looks completely beat down and lifeless. Watch out for those Simon Suckers, Kris. They'll get ya every time.

And while Allison was stellar singing Janis' "Cry Baby," her "Slow Ride" duet with Adam stole the show! And really people, could their embrace at the end have been any cuter? "She's like my little sister," Adam said. Aw! Gee guys. You're killing me here! And I must say, I LOVED Allison's sassiness after the judges told her that they thought she didn't pick the right song. For those of you loyal myrealitybit followers, you know that I can't STAND the SASS! But Allison did it in a manner that was so endearing, so darn cute, it made her more lovable than anything else. Of course I started shaking in my boots as soon as she started out with the whole, "it was Jefferson Airplane. And Piece of My Heart has been done." But as soon as she threw her hands up in the air, and told Simon, "you always say I should talk more, so maybe I should talk a lot. You just want me to let go," I wanted to tell her, "you had me at hello, Allison. You had me at hello." It was precious. Almost as precious as the pig-tails she was sporting during her meeting with Slash (how CUTE were those?!).

So what did you all think of this crazy Rock night? Should Adam have gone first? Do I even need to ask which duet you preferred? Was it obvious that Slash was referring to Adam when he said he only wanted to mentor because this season had a couple of standouts? Who would be the other one? Did you just love the moment when Kris said he wanted to pee his pants after meeting Slash as much as I did? And last but not least, who do you think DESERVES to go home?

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American Idol: Rock Predictions for Our TOP 4!

Tonight on American Idol, it's our Top 4 and . . . Slash! Now there's some words I never thought I'd string together in a sentence. I wonder if the Guns & Roses and Velvet Revolver front man will have the ever-present cigarette hanging from his mouth as he mentors our tender, young Idols . . .

No matter. I am READY to ROCK! Tonight should definitely be interesting. Word on the street is that we might be in for a duet treat! Could this be? My dreams coming true of Adam and Allison singing together, just the two of them, on that wondrous Idol stage? Tantalizing me with hints of my Final Two dream? And oh yeah, Kris and Danny can sing together too.

The other word on the street is that tonight's songs come from the 70's and 80's. So without further ado . . . I present to you my ROCK predictions:

Rocker Chick Allison: Is it way too obvious to predict Janis for our lovable little red head? I have to include at least one, so I'll go with "Me & Bobby McGee." Or, she would be great for "I Love Rock & Roll" or maybe even some "Black Velvet." Oh yeah, "Black Velvet" would be SWEET!

Danny Gokey: Wow. Now THIS is a hard one for the Michael McDonald sound-a-like. (On a side note, Rock Week could not have come at a better time for my prediction of a Gokey fourth place finish.) But (Gokey lovers), he has surprised me before, and maybe, just maybe, he can do it again? Possibly when pigs fly, but hey, I'm not counting him out. Two words: "Free Bird."

Kris Allen: I'm picturing this plaid-loving little puppy dog more in the Bob Dylan, possibly even Lou Reed, vibe. "Tangled Up in Blue"? "Walk on the Wild Side"? But what I would really like to see Kris do is "When Doves Cry." I was reserving it for Adam, but I think it could suit Kris very well. Oh crap. There's always U2 also.

ROCK GOD, Mr. Amazing, Second-Coming-Of-Elivs, the Next American Idol, Adam Lambert: (If you're thinking, "gee, at least someone's not biased," I simply reply, "who ME?") Carrying on. Since many compare Adam's vocals to the stylings of Axl Rose, it might be fitting for Adam to sing "Sweet Child Of Mine." Personally, I see him singing "Patience" before that choice, and if he does, ooooohh . . . I will be swaying back and forth just like Axl in my living room, belting along, "I've been walking the streets at night. Just trying to get it right." (Yes. It is very entertaining come 8:00 on a Tuesday night in my humble abode.) Regardless of what my baby sings, I hope he has heard my silent prayer for the past week: "Please, Adam. Don some black leather pants? The tighter. The better? It's just little ol' me . . . Elizabeth. Kisses."

What do you all think? Please post any predictions that strike you below. And who do you think will perform last in the pimp slot tonight? It is a fact that Mr. Lambert has never gone first, but would they dare try and do that tonight?! Five hours til showtime!

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American Idol: Rock Predictions to Come!

Okay, everybody. I'm still mulling over my IDOL predictions for tonight. Hopefully, I should have them posted by mid-afternoon. I really want to give it some thought since there are only FOUR left! In the meantime, Happy Cinco De Mayo! And Happy Idol Tuesday!! Can't wait!

In the meantime, what songs do you think we will hear tonight?

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The Hills: Cat Fights! (and a bit of a rant)

Oh, this season's Hills is shaping up to be better than I anticipated! Tonight's episode featured not one, but TWO cat fights! Girls hating on other girls for the guys' mistakes. What's up with that? If you're going to hate on the girl your guy is cheating on you with . . . why not hate the guy too? I just don't get it.

And as much as I hate Stacie's helium voice, she does have a point, enlightening poor, pouty Heidi, "... there's always going to be another Stacie." And here I thought she was only good for a "Pour Some Sugar on me Play." Yes, Spencer may not cheat on Heidi again with Stacie, but I have a feeling his cheating ways will eventually resurface. At least they're attending "therapy," which, I must say, I am loving by the way!

But what I'm NOT loving is the pug face that is Brody's girlfriend, Jayde! Eeeww! Homegirl is nasty! Drink some more jager girl. Hate on the poor-dreenster because you are insecure, and then prove your insecurity more by planting one on your cheating boyfriend to prove he's all yours, you nasty thing you. And come on Brody . . . grow a backbone!! I guess some guys just can't MAN-up.

On a side note, Stephanie Pratt always has such words of wisdom, giving us her amazing insight into Jayde: "She probably sleeps in her makeup."

Not to be outdone, Lauren is always one to be counted on for the true pearls, telling Audrina, "Brody owes you an apology. You need to be like, This is between you guys. Just back out." Amen, Lauren! Let them live in their own misery.

Thank you, ladies, for such a wonderful episode. And to all you girls out there, Give UP your Man if He's Cheating on You! It ain't the other girl's problem. Who's problem it will ultimately be is yours.

I digress.

But I still have to ask: Is it hard for you to watch the Speidi-Stacie triangle considering we know in real life, Speidi just got married? Also, how did we like the dreen-ster's jack-o hat? I'm not quite sure how it stayed on her head. And were you as scared as I was seeing ol' pug face down that jager? That stuff is dangerous! And hey, maybe Jayde and J. Bobby should get together -- she doesn't like to be petted and he doesn't like to be patted! Just a thought ...

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The Fashion Show? Replacing my Project Runway?

So I just saw a preview on BRAVO for a new series, The Fashion Show, premiering next Thursday. It looks like it will be Bravo's Project Runway's replacement. Hmmm . . . could this be just as good or will it be a lame copy-cat? Isaac Mizrahi hosts (well, co-hosts if you want to count Kelly Rowland), and I must say, I do like him. "The challenges are designed to get you ready for the actual real world," Isaac says. Is this a hint that Project Runway's grocery store challenges aren't? (Corn husks for a micro-mini anyone?) And if Merlin (who we see in this introduction clip) makes it far. . . I just might have to tune in! Will you?

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Celebrity Apprentice: Three Chickens Go "Cluck, Cluck, Cluck ... SPLAT!"

Holy S-R-A-P! (Thank you, Brande, for demonstrating that maybe Joan was right on Ellen, when she said, "Brande couldn't even spell 'mom' backwards.") Whether you want to argue Brande as a "dumb blonde" or as a genius on the verge of some hot new catch-phrase, it doesn't dispute the fact that Holy SRAP!, we said goodbye to THREE peeps on the Celebrity Apprentice last night . . . leaving us with the FINAL TWO: Annie Duke (who I think was an obvious choice) and Ms. Joan Rivers herself! Guess this "geriatric comedienne" finally cooled her jets after last week's firing of her precious chick-a-dee. And while I realize Joan's actual punchline was "cluck, cluck, cluck . . . SPLASH" -- seeing that Donald didn't crack a smile after she delivered it, I'm changing it to SPLAT. For the sake of this article's sense (and because I don't want to upset the Donald!).

First Chickie to go SPLAT: Clint Black. I'm sorry . . . but how satisfying was it to see Clint finally lose? And on a music challenge no less!? I'll admit, I thought KOTU was a shoe-in. I (along with everyone else it seems, besides the Chicken of the Sea reps) liked his jingle better. But Clint's demise was his lack of listening skills. Everything was his way or the highway. Sure, maybe Joan shouldn't have been such a wuss and confronted Clint a little more herself instead of using poor Jesse as a decoy, but I say Que Sera, Sera. I was happy to see the weasel go!

Second Chickie to go SPLAT: Brande Roderick. No surprise here. Brande proved in last night's Chicken of the Sea advertising challenge to be utterly useless! I mean, what did she contribute besides annoyingly singing every five seconds?! True, it is easy to become a puppet when working alongside Poker-Master Duke, but come on! And Brande did not help herself in trying to fight the dumb blonde stereotype by saying things like "bills and whistles" (did anyone else catch that?). But hey, maybe she is just trying to walk in the path of Jessica Simpson's greatness. ("Is this chicken, what I have, or is this fish? I know it's tuna, but it says 'Chicken by the Sea.'")

Third Chickie to go SPLAT: Jesse James. As much as I would have liked to have seen ol' tight-lipped James in the final two, I am excited to witness Annie and Joan battle it out. (Coincidence that it's these two who remain, considering they loathe each other? Most likely not.) But Jesse did prove to be a disappointment in the boardroom, lacking the intensity and drive needed to win. I just wanted to shake him and say, "come on man, loosen one of those shirt buttons, smile a little, and get some fire under that there belly!" He is, in my opinion, genius when it comes to advertising and being a silent leader, but DID YOU KNOW . . . I just don't see him rallying those celebs for money. A shame too considering who his wife is (but we heard enough of that already from Pierce and Donald).

So, for next week's finale, we are left with Joan "sound bite queen" Rivers and Annie "yes there IS an "I" in team" Duke. (That is, unless she doesn't decide to run off to try and pursue a career in professional music. If I had to hear about how much she liked HER damn jingle one more time ... I would have ripped my own hair out. No I take that back. I would have ripped Donald Junior's hair out . . . a little more grease on that head, and I could have fried me up some french fries! Eeew.)
So where do you all weigh in? Are you happy with the final two? Who would you like to see become the Celebrity Apprentice? And did you notice (like me) the many glorious sound bites this episode provided? In fact, I'll inject a mini-quiz here. Which one was your favorite sound bite?:
1) "I am now doing it the way Helen Keller would have done it." (- Joan, after being told by Black she wasn't allowed to speak while holding her sign)
2) "Any team Annie is on is spelled t-i-i-i-i-i-i"(a-m, mouthed silently)." (- Joan speaking of the woman she refers to as worse than Hitler)
3) "Annie can do everything you know . . . the task should have been walking on water." (- Joan)
4) "Does it make you wanna go eat some tuna?" (-Clint Black to Ivanka)
5) "I guess it's just me and you bitches. Do you guys want to play checkers?" (-Jesse James)
6) "Tuna in a pouch? I don't like that." (-Donald Trump on the brand they are trying to promote.) 

Finally, as Annie and Brande sang along to their jingle, and Donald danced, did anyone else have flashbacks of his SNL House of Wings skit?! You gotta love it! Please answer these important questions below.

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WOW! WOW! WOW!

Wow! This post goes a little out of the usual realm of things, but I just HAD to post it! This little girl is AMAZING! I just learned of her when going through some "Ellen" recordings and found one with Joan and Melissa Rivers. So I thought I would write a post based off of some antics they might throw out . . . but this little girl, Emily Bear, happened to be on the same episode, which aired April 30th, and she quickly stole that spotlight. YouTube did not have this episode's performance posted of her yet, but here is just one of her many magical moments. PLEASE watch the whole clip. It is simply incredible.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DdZx1oIgAHk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0jFnF0k5IJ0&NR=1 (this second one at the 4:30 mark brought a tear to my eye.)

WOW! WOW! WOW!

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It's Look-A-Like . . .um Friday!?

Left: The Hills', Audrina Patridge
Right: Actress, Isabel Lucas

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