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Celebrity Apprentice: The Rivers "Ladies" Kiss Off!

How about that Celebrity Apprentice last night?! This episode was so jam-packed with a Rumbling of the Rivers, I can't even express how frustrated I was (yet again) with the stubborn troll that is Clint Black. (I mean really people, how many times could he say the word "branding"? And does he really think the key ingredient to every ad campaign is a dash of t & a?) His ignorant behavior just made my soft spot for genius, Jesse James, grow even more. But enough of that, the Rivers have been rippled! . . . And it ain't pretty, folks.

Just when I was starting to (and please, brace yourself and make sure you are sitting down), just when I was starting to like Melissa Rivers, they fire her! I know what you're thinking. Did I really just use the words "like" and "Melissa Rivers" in the same sentence!?!? Let me clarify. I liked watching Melissa finding herself becoming the unpopular girl in high school, reacting to mean girls, Brande and Annie. Her classic lines (as she stands alone outside by the bus she must be so terrified of being thown under) such as "I had some cute funny ideas . . . but apparently I'm living in this weird cone of si-lence" were classic! And please let us not forget the awesome facial expressions that go along with such a statement - like she just whoofed down three sour balls and yet, still trys to smile at the same time. Yes, in this sense, Melissa added EXTREME entertainment value to the show ever since the derailment of Trainwreck Rodman!

But after a heated boardroom, in which Brande finally grew a backbone (how uncomfortable was that to watch?), and in which the Donald slipped a mysterious note to an over-reactive John Moschitta look-a-like, Melissa is fired.

But you better believe Mommy Dearest has something to say about this. As quickly as Melissa stormed out of the boardroom, hobbling along all gimpish-like and still trying to look authoritative, ordering production, "I want my stuff!" and "No interview!", Mommy Joan is packing her stuff too and it's a River Rumble! Never one to believe her cry-baby daughter could possibly be fired on the merit that she most likely couldn't fund raise enough when it comes down to crunch time, Joan has to belittle Annie exclaiming over and over again, with a complete look of disgust on her face, "You're a poker player. A poker player." Well what the hell are you Joan? And, I'm sorry, what the hell is your daughter?! And does Annie's money really have blood on it? Hmmmm. These two need a life-lift as opposed to another face-lift. Even though Joan provided the quote of the night ("Clint is a one man band. He would give himself a hickey."), I still find myself disgusted with her.

What do you think? Are you sad Melissa is gone for the sheer entertainment factor of it all? And do you care to even see Joan come back?! My gut says we haven't seen the last of that cat woman!


  1. connie4/28/2009

    I'd have a much higher opinion (like maybe a 1 on a scale of 1 to 10) had Melissa bowed out with even a smidgen of grace. No I won't miss the weekly whining. I think she was right though that she wasn't looked upon as a part of the team. Annie has one agenda. It's ALL about Annie. "He's a friend of mine" and Joan's Christmas card list remark was my fav of the night.

    Joan will be back, but actually, I don't see her as a valuable team member. I don't really care if the Rivers stop flowing through Trumpville.

    I am so glad that Jesse shook hands in the boardroom, with Clint. His f-word filled tirade against Clint earlier, disappointed me. I don't like seeing that from Jesse. Clint is a egotistical grinning ass in a cowboy hat. Enough said.

    I don't like Annie's personality, BUT she's playing the game.

    Can you imagine the Donald in a 10 gallon hat? Dare we dream of him covering that creepy hair?

  2. oh my. i do believe i missed this "Christmas card list remark" you speak of. you will have to fill me in more.

    and yes, annie is a bit of a name-dropper and is a tad scary. i must say, though, i do enjoy seeing how she uses her poker tactics in this "game."

    And I'm with ya . . I don't care if the Rivers flow through Trumpville anymore either! Ha! I was soooo wishing "trump" was a poker term when I wrote this recap!


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